Tag: Intimate affairs

Virgin hunter, By Funke Egbemode

Funke Egbemode

Why, how do men who have burgled many virgins’ coven suddenly develop a taste and thirst for virgin brides? Do they not know that once a virgin has been undone, the damage is irreversible? Tamuno was a man-about-town. He played the field and sowed generously. He gave himself as well as his substance. He was the Nigerian version of Don Juan. He knew where all a girl’s buttons were and once he got his fingers on them, he kept them there until both he and the girl were sated and…

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His Fortune, Her stress, By Funke Egbemode

Funke Egbemode

  “The politician’s wife. She is the envy of many women. But there is the private pain. Her husband is hardly ever available even when he is sitting right beside her. His libido is down because he is preoccupied, he says, but she believes it is because he is servicing many websites outside.”     Sometimes a woman finds herself at a destination she did not plan for, a place where she neither bargained for nor boarded a bus or plane to. She just wakes up and finds herself there,…

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Manless and happy, By Funke Egbemode

ADEOLA YUSUF

Without a man, you could spend a week in the same clothes without a shower if you want. You can wear your comfortable black bra for two weeks. Who will know when there is no boyfriend ‘doing general checking?   We all experience it at one point or the other, that dry season when a woman is simply totally ‘manless’. The men can’t find you or you can’t find them. What you choose to do with this break now depends on you but I can tell you for free that…

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Food for the gods, by Funke Egbemode

ADEOLA YUSUF

“Madam BD does not share her man. All the girls he had dated have sad stories to tell.”   Kudi, fine-girl-no-pimples, was one of those undergraduates who lived their lives on their own terms on campus. Kay-girl, as she was fondly called, was an ‘aristo’ girl. Small-small boys were not her thing. She liked them known and rich, politicians and business tycoons. The age or size of their bellies did not matter. They just needed to be loaded in their pockets but if they were loaded ‘downstairs’ too, ah, that…

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Bad boys, Soft Life And Used Girls, By Funke Egbemode

Funke Egbemode

“Dear mothers, my dear sisters and daughters, this ugly trend is heartrending. It’s not a matter we can invite the police into or a case we can prove in court.”     Remember the good old days of Finance Houses in Nigeria? Our young men achieved success overnight. One minute they were marketing officers and the next, they were on management floor. Those places were real magic places. And you know how young men who come into money early run things. They simply remember their long gone ancestor, the prodigal…

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